One Gargantuan Monkey Fist

THIS BLOG HAS MOVED

2005-09-30T10:23:00.000-04:00

FELLAS, THIS BLOG HAS NOW MOVED TO
HTTP://DESINOLE.COM

PLEASE UPDATE YOUR BOOKMARKS AND THANKS FOR YOUR SUPPORT.

Everybody Hates Chris

2005-09-22T11:03:00.000-04:00

Everybody Hates Chris is a new show on TV starting today. Check out the 7 minute preview.

Chris Rock has always been a shade apart from the other stand up comedians. If you leave out the crude ladies parts, he is one of the few men out there who makes sense.

As I watched the pilot, I was reminded of The Wonder Years. Those who know and have seen Kevin will enjoy this show. Its funnier and the narration by Chris is amazing.

So check it out, its on tonite at 8 and lemme know what y'all think.

Told you that google was upto something.

2005-09-20T10:09:00.000-04:00

Google has now released a VPN client and WiFi access.

http://wifi.google.com/faq.html (via http://slashdot.org/)

Let's atleast call it Air Force Aik

India's own air force one (via rediff.com)

Why not just make a "Stop growing hair" product ?

2005-09-14T13:53:00.000-04:00

I remember the time when there were razors with just one flat blade. The problem was that you had to change blades pretty often. Then came the two blade disposable ones and then the three blade ones.

That was when I stopped following the number of blades and just went with something that I liked.

As I was sifting thro the news, I read Gillette has come up with a 5 blade razor. Why not just make a "Stop growing hair" product ? Wouldn't that be simpler ?

http://www.gillettenews.com/men/index_fusion.htm

Add these two together.... hmmm Google is upto something

2005-09-09T09:56:00.000-04:00

August 28, 2005

Google Seeks to Develop Parallel Internet?

Browsing through slashdot, I came across this article about google buying unused fiber optic cables.

Sep 9, 2005

Google snaps up internet pioneer

A couple of weeks later, this, Google picks up the Pioneer of the internet as we know it.

If I get this right, pretty soon, we will all be using googles high speed internet service or even possibly its wireless service. That is going to be very.... should I say Intresting.

Do not steal, if you do, make sure you do not sell it on an online auction to the original owner via (http://fark.com)

GM gives free passes in a bid to lure people away from toyota. Toyota execs had a few choice words, read the last line.via (http://fark.com)

Finally a fortune cookie makes sense... well atleast it made us laugh.

2005-09-07T14:30:00.000-04:00

Read on, this post is not about the picture on your left.

Chinese resturants always finish off the meal by giving you a check and a fortune cookie. Its a fortune cookie, coz it the cookie has a little message on it. Since most chinese buffets are "all you can eat", I tend to go there pretty often.

But there has never been a time when those messages made any sense. They were badly formed sentences or they just did not mean anything. A while ago, I came across this picture and have always wondered if something funny like this would ever happen.

And it did.... Finally.

So here I am in San Jose at P.F.Changs (which I recommend you go to when you get a chance, its the most amazing Chinese resturant I have ever been to) with a friend and his fiance. I have known these people for years, but we have never had the time to meet each other. Now that they are engaged, they were the topic of discussion.

As we are finishing up the fortune cookies are dropped off at our table. My friends fiance is the first to open it and she starts laughing. Her fortune says "An Admirer is concealing his affection for you". We spend five minutes discussing who this person could be, just for kicks.

As we are doing this, my friend goes next. He has the same reaction as her, he is now laughing. His fortune says "The smart thing is to prepare for the unexpected". I could not control my laughter.

Now I am raring to open my fortune and after a little struggle with the plastic wrapper, I finally open it. "Be Patient. Good things come to those who wait" is what my message says. I could not control my laughter, neither could they.

It was really intresting that for the first time a fortune made sense and it was funny for the right reasons.

So keep eating that chinese food, you never know when you will get a good laugh out of it.

Amazing Ad

2005-08-08T10:03:00.000-04:00

Check out this ad ..... http://www.bigad.com.au

Who are these people ?

2005-07-28T13:46:00.000-04:00

1) Checking my stats I see that various bloggers have referred me. When I goto their site, I don't find a link anymore. So if you read this and have blogrolled me or anything like that, please let me know, so I can return the favor.

2) Offshore Software Engineers Based In Cruise Ship off California
via(http://www.blogsource.org/2005/05/offshore_softwa.html)

Who are these people ? And please don't answer it, its more of a rhetorical question. But the concept is amazing, although it has been borrowed from the casino boats that sail to international waters.

Also visit http://seacode.com. And a very interesting name, I must say.

3) Open source beer ? Isn't that pushing it too far ?
via (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/4718719.stm)

Students from the Information Technology University in Copenhagen are trying to help by releasing what they are calling the world's first open source beer recipe.

Read more about this beer at http://www.voresoel.dk/

Who is more confused ? - Indians in the USA explained

2005-07-27T11:40:00.000-04:00

This is Part 2 of Indians in the USA explained, please read this if you have not done so. http://clrkn.blogspot.com/2005/07/indians-in-usa-explained.html

It is a well understood concept that the ABCD's are generally perceived as the confused ones. It is a statement every Indian will make (the ones who spent a considerable amount of time in India).

But honestly, after spending close to 3 and a half years in this country, I beg to disagree.

ABCD's are American's, they know what they want, they don't have a problem "breaking the rules". They could love Dal Chaval, the good looking Indian women and classical Indian music, but that does not mean they are confused. They simply happen to like certain things about their homeland. At the end of they day, they still are American and do not feel guilty doing things.

As compared to people like me, who have brought into the American culture where I have one leg on the shore and one on the boat.

Like for example, I like to go out drinking, hang out with my buddies and try "ethnic" food. Things that I would never be able to do, atleast not twice or even thrice a week if I were back home with my parents around. No its not about what they would say, but more about the respect that exists between us.

But then, when I come back home, I always go to bed craving for curd rice and some pickle. Its just me, I like doing stuff, but I can't get over my need for certain Indian things. For someone who used to take South Indian food for granted, now I drive four hours to get some decent dosas.

It does not end there, the problems creep into every aspect of my life, right from me not removing my sacred thread even when I swim to what kind of music I listen to. Green day is amazing, but why not Rehman once in a while.

As an Indian, I am in a fix, I can't sell myself out to the American culture, I am selectively pleased by their culture, but I can never see myself doing certain things, like survive on bread or variations of it.

On the other hand, I can't stop being an Indian, how can I ever give up rice and curd and pickles. I have had many American friends look at me like I was crazy for eating such a "weird" concoction.

so here I am stuck in the middle and often find myself more confused than those so called ABCD's. So the next time you decide on using that word, think about it for a minute, who is more confused, it is you ? Or is it them ?

Indian's in the USA explained.

2005-07-20T11:49:00.000-04:00

This post is just an explanation of reality. It is in no way intended to name, discriminate or classify people. This is a representation of the language used by Indians in the USA.

There are three categories of Indians in the USA.

ABCD's (American Born Confused Desis). I don't really like the name, but hey its how they are referred to and I have to stick to the code. Kids of Immigrants who did their high school here are generally given this name. They look Indian and thats where the similarity ends. They talk, walk and drive like every other american.

H1-b. Guys who come from India directly to work here in the USA. They are here strictly to work and make some dough. You can spot them easily, coz they do really have the Indian accent and always look at everything with great awe (their mouth open). These people are our regular desis, good at heart and Fresh Off the Boat.

PIGS (Poor Indian Grad. Students) formerly FOB (Fresh off the Boat). The Initial few months of a grad students life is like a H1-b, they are awed by everything and slowly become PIGS. They make enough money to buy an old car (like me) and manage to make ends meet with great difficulty. The name PIGS I am told comes from ABCD's, who have all the money as compared to the grad students.

Given the background, some grad students tend to shift and accept the american culture. They start partying, hanging out with americans and do things that their parents would think was a waste of money and basically a costly affair. There are guys who tend to shift to a category in between PIGS and ABCD's. This category has not found a popular name yet.

The other set of guys, always tend to hang out with Desis, spend as little money as possbile, mooch off of the guys who spend more and stay with 3 other desis even after graduating from school and getting a full time job. There are guys who shift to a category in between PIGS and H1-b's. Just like the previous case, this category has not found a name yet.

I am giving you all this background info, coz my next post deals with how non-sensical these names are. Again, there are exceptions, but my post will deal with the general Indian public in this country.

Fashion Shows - No no the real ones

2005-07-19T15:23:00.000-04:00

I can totally understand REAL fashion shows. The ones in which designers come out with new designs, looks and things that will be in vogue. But those fashion shows by students....

Just like when Red bull decided to have the cast from Star Wars in the pit lane in Monaco, which somehow made Formula 1 a different kind of show, students in my opinion pollute the meaning of a Fashion show.

A fashion show in its truest sense is for professionals, who have come up with a new concept or idea and have a place to showcase it, either for fame or for some commercial value. Students on the other hand walk down the ramp wearing clothes that I would wear to wedding (a nicely embellished kurta) or something that I wear to college (my faded jean and thirt that says Spot the Indian and the sun glasses of course) everyday. This is not a fashion show, this is a bunch of wannabe kids who are showing off their wardrobe and to make a competition out of it is equating it to who has the best clothes and who has the coolest walk in front of a hundred people.

Get real people, stop screwing around with the real thing.

The Automobile Tag

2005-07-18T10:04:00.000-04:00

I was tagged the last time by Kriba about books. Being a not so avid reader, here is a topic that is more close to my heart. Automobiles. And yeah, I thought I might do something different and see how things turn out.

When I was a kid, I lived in Conoor. My landlords being Anglo-Indians, had a bunch load of foreign cars. These included a really nice, left hand drive Beetle, which of course was the first Non-Indian car that took a ride in. I was also fortunate to drive in an 80's Merc and an Isuzu. Hence the special attraction to these amazing pieces of engineering.

So here goes,

The car that You currently drive:

A 1990 Nissan 240 SX. Its an automatic and no I don't like automatics, but this is my student car and I had to settle for what I could find, given my budget. But over the years, I have gotten to love this car. Its small, sporty and fast.

The 240SX

The car that you might buy:

If my future holds me being a family man:
Choice 1) BMW M3

This is a sporty German car. BMW's have a charisma, I might settle for a 2003 325 Ci that costs almost half of what a new one would cost, but if I have my way, I might spend about 10 grand more and get this.

Choice 2) A Chrysler 300 M.

This car has the looks of a Rolls Royce Phantom, but is mighty cheap. I for some reason love the boxy looks. 4 doors and you cant go wrong.

If I am single for a few more years, which is the likely case

Choice 1) A Nissan My Fair Lady (a 350z as its called here in the USA)

Ever since I got my 240 SX, I have done so much reading about NISMO (Nissan Motor Sports) that I have wanted to buy the fastest Nissan sports car in the USA.

Nissan 350 Z

Choice 2) A Nissan My Fair Lady from 1997 (Called a 300zx) Twin Turbo.

Again, Coz its a nissan and 97 was the last year they made it.

1997 Nissan 300zx

If they made this car again:

Choice 1) The Nissan Skyline GTR R34.

How could you not ? Besides, they never made this car for the USA. There are rumors that Nissan is thinking about a 2007 GTR. Count me in, I know it means I cant pay rent and have to sleep in the car, but hey for a GTR, I just might do it.

Nissan Skyline GTR

Choice 2) The Nissan 240 SX.

I have this car and I know a new one with a more powerful engine cannot go wrong.

If money was not an Issue:

Choice 1) Enzo Ferrari.

The whole F1 addiction, the Ferrari craze and the amount of carbon fiber on that car.

Enzo Ferrari

Choice 2) Porsche Carrera GT.

Its a porsche and its their fastest street legal car. So why not, its not like I have the money.

Five People to Tag
Kriba
Hemanth
Lazy Geek
Bharath
Kaatss

Answering machine messages - how NOT to....

2005-07-16T10:20:00.000-04:00

Answering machines are one of the coolest inventions. It allows you to screen calls, not pick up your phone and piss people off and more importantly leave that nasty breakup message without talking to the person.

But of late people have been pissing me off, leaving messages on my answering machine. I always get that "Call me back as soon as you get this message" in a very tense tone. The whole point of an answering machine is to leave a message that means something. I have caller id and I know you called and yes, unlike most people who I know (sorry prabhu) I will return calls. But if you are going to leave me a message, tell me something that I already dont know. As soon as I hear a message like "call me back ASAP", I go holy shit, he crashed his car again or he got fired again. So please stop doing that.

Always leave your name in the message. I have had messages where the person calls me after a gazillion years. For some reason I do not have their number on my phone and I dont really know who called, so what do you do at this point ? You try to decipher the message and guess who it could be. If you really want me to call you back, leave your name, If you have been good to me, I might just call you.

And finally... never ever ever leave a message from a club or a concert. You guys have no clue about how difficult it is to listen to such a message the first thing in the morning. It not just hurts emotionally knowing that I could not go out, coz I had to get my ass to work, but also straining my ears to catch every thing you said is not something I wanna do early in the morning. So find a quiet nook if you wanna leave me a message.

Still better send me a Text message.

Simpsons - Now being created for India

2005-07-14T14:53:00.000-04:00

No, not really, but this is a really nice spoof of the Simpsons.

Have Fun
http://www.badmash.org/images/singhsons.swf

And another flash animation that everyone SHOULD check out.

http://freegreymatter.com/index.php?p=67

Eat Curry and Avoid Cancer

2005-07-12T13:39:00.000-04:00

Research by University of Texas has proved that this is true. Ahh the pleasure of eating Desi food just multiplied a hundred fold.

How about an educated politician with a Masters Diploma in Government ?

2005-07-11T09:33:00.000-04:00

Hello My Tifosi Chums,

The hurricane Dennis passed my town without much damage. In between this, a killer work schedule and my personal life taking a exponential downward spiral, I have not had time to post.

Its a fact that most politicians in India are not educated. Most of them are conferred with a honorary degree. But things are about to change. The Maharashtra Academy of Engineering and Educational Research has a new school. The MIT School of Government (MITSOG).

The best part is that the school is its chairman and dean, Mr. T.N.Seshan. He claims this to be the first institute in Asia to offer a full-fledged post graduate course in social and political leadership with a Masters Diploma in Government. How cool is a course like that ? This is the first time I have heard of a course with such a name.

I have a deep respect for Mr. Seshan, he took on the politicians and flipped them around like broccoli in stir-fry pan. It was amazing. The guy is practical and he welcomed booth capturing. His response was "India is the largest democracy and a miniscule percentage of booth capturing shows the frustration of people, nothing to be worried about".

Good Luck Mr. Seshan and if I get a chance, I might come by and check out the classes ;-).

You can read an article in the Hindu at http://www.hindu.com/2005/07/12/stories/2005071209120100.htm

The MISSOG website is here http://www.mitsog.com/. Check out the dean's message.

30 Days - An amazing TV show that you have to watch

2005-06-30T09:07:00.000-04:00

Last night, my roomie was flipping thro channels. Top gear (yeah the famous BBC car show) was on FX. Since we were also watching something else, we kept flipping thro both the channels.

When we got back to FX, there was an ad for a show called 30 days. This show was by this guy called Morgan Spurlock, the same guy who created the documentary called Supersize Me. A movie about surviving only on McDonald's for a month. Given the fact that my roomie liked the way Morgan thinks, we decided to check this show out.

The show was about Muslims in America and a Anglo-American from West Vigrina, who was born and raised catholic was the main character. Given that he knew nothing about Muslims, his challenge was to spend 30 days in Dearborn, Mi with a Muslim family.

If you get a chance, see this show, it was amazing. I have personally had a couple of Muslim friends back in India, but I knew nothing about their religion. At the end I was amazed by how the views of the guy changed when he completed the 30 days. In fact I have had lots of questions about Islam that I had no clue about. The show described lots of these things with a little cartoon movie. Things like how Jews, Christians and Muslims are from the same origin (religiously) were shown in a little kinda funny cartoon movie.

The funniest part was when the catholic American guy was asked to go and get signatures for a petition against racial profiling of Muslims and Arabs, dressed as a Muslim, he was unsuccessful. When he was in the airport wearing the little Muslim hat, he was asked to take his shoes off and was given the wand. I sometimes feel that way too, so this show kinda brought back memories of me being "randomly selected" for security checks. A similar incident (now its a funny story) happened to me when we got pulled over in Arkansas (The Cop Says "get out of the car, put your hands on the hood and spread your legs")

I am definitely hooked on to this show, I can't guarantee that every episode will be this interesting, but check it out and decide for yourself.

Morgan Spurlock's Blog : http://blogs.indiewire.com/morganspurlock/archives/004224.html
30 Days website : http://www.fxnetworks.com/shows/originals/30days/main.html

Then why the hell did they complete the formation lap ?

2005-06-19T22:49:00.000-04:00

When the michelin shot teams say they are sorry, do not beleive them. They are not. As this artivle puts it, the miclelin teams f'ed the FIA and they f'ed the fans. They completed their contractual agreement by running in the formation lap and now they cannot be sued. BUT THEY CAN BE FINED BY THE FIA, did any freaking moron think about that ?. http://www.pitpass.com/fes_php/pitpass_news_item.php?fes_art_id=24903

MICHELIN BLAMES FIA FOR INDY CRISIS

http://www.itv-f1.com/News_Article.aspx?PO_ID=33194
LOL

Thats all I have to say.

FIA offered options to the Michelin teams, they did not accept it.

http://www.sportinglife.com/others/news/story_get.dor?STORY_NAME=others/05/06/19/AUTO_United_States_Mosley.html

And now they want to turn around and blame the FIA, what a bunch of losers.

Who is responsible for the Indianapolis Fiasco

2005-06-19T22:21:00.000-04:00

Given that you already know my view about the issue, its now time to see who f'ed up.

I have some additional information now that I did not have before.

Michelin had two drivers conduct tests at Indy. Just two. Everyone else was testing at silverstone.

The FIA is the governing body. It is there to make the rules and see that everyone else follows the rules as they were laid down.

It is the responsibilities of the manufacturers and the teams to actually go on with the event.

In this case, safety was an issue, if it was... Then the teams should have decided to run, but run slowly.

I think its gross negligence on the part of the Teams and more importantly on Michelin to actually decide not to race. Michelin did not do the homework and the fault solely lies on them. The teams decided not to race and they should be held financially responsible along with Michelin for the fiasco.

I will try to get the transcript from Wind Tunnel - A talk show on TV, where Peter Windsor. He gave an analogy similar to mine, if a football team (soccer) has smaller cleats and it happened to rain, would it be logical or legal for them to ask for the goal posts to be extended, because they have no grip ? That's what the 7 teams wanted. Even if Ferrari had agreed to the chicane, it would have been illegal.

Keep reading, I am here for more analysis on how Michelin screwed up.

Why Michelin should be banned from F1

2005-06-19T17:01:00.000-04:00

Firstly, The 3 teams that took part in the US Grand Prix at Indianapolis were not at fault. Ferrari was not at fault. There were rules and the other decided that they wanted to change it. How would you like it if a cricket game was to be cut down to 25 overs if the shoes of one team were not made right ?

How would you like it if a professional football team demanded to not be tackled, coz their suits were not built right ?

Michelin was responsible for supplying tyres. They had two sets (this is not entirely clear) but all teams decided to qualify with the bad set. A professional corporation like Michelin should have made sure that they tested and made the results available way before the race, not the morning of.

If someone is to blame, it is Michelin. There was nothing the FIA could do, if a chicane was added, the FIA rightly said they would pull off their name and would not make the race official. They were absolutely right. Why should the FIA make changes coz Michelin F'ed up ?

And stop blaming Ferrari. They have had bad tires for the whole season and they took the brunt. Now you want to blame them again for Michelin's fault. This just ain't right.

I think Michelin should be banned not just from F1 but also from racing in whole. Again a professional organization should not be making mistakes like this and certaily not at this level of sporting.

More commentary on this will follow.

Taking a piss is a bad thing.... Here are two reasons

2005-06-17T13:04:00.000-04:00

Two separate incidents happened over the course of the past year that made me come to the conclusion.

Its 2004 Madigras (http://www.mardigras.com/). A festival celebrated in new Orleans, everyone drinks, parties and has fun. 5 Friends of mine decided to go spend the weekend in new Orleans.

Saturday evening, they decide to split up, they did not learn anything from the British, but anyways, the plan was to go party and come back at 4 to the car. They would take a nap and drive back later on Sunday.

All goes well, by 7 in the morning, 4 of the 5 guys are back. The fifth one, an IIT grad and a PhD. Student here does not show up. After trying to call his cellphone and figuring out that his battery was dead, the guys assumed that he had gotten lucky and would be back in a couple of hours.

It was 9 on Sunday morning, the dude was still missing. Someone suggested calling the cops and they did. You have to understand that madigras is like a festival. There are hundreds of thousands of people in a dirty small city. The cops are always overworked and underpaid at this time of the year. So the 911 operator takes down the information and says she will get back. She suggests that they walk up to the nearest police station and file a complaint.

So the 4 tired and worn out Indians goto the police station. They fill out the report and are walking out when they hear the voice of the 5th guy talking to someone. They approach the officer and tell him that it sounds like their friend. The officer takes them to the back and inside the prison cell is the missing guy.

Shocked they ask him as to what happened. He says " I looked around and there was no one there, so I decided to take a piss.... The officer arrested me"

Around the same time of the year, another friend of mine was also caught peeing. Except he did not get arrested. The officer instead asked him to take his shirt off and use the shirt to clean up the mess.

So if you ever think about letting it loose, make sure you have a phone number to make that "one call" or that you atleast have a shirt on, one that you would not mind missing.

Microsoft Meets the Hackers

2005-06-17T09:41:00.000-04:00

I would like to apologize to the regular readers of my blog (who are you guys anyways?) I had a family situation and work was killing me and I could not blog for the past week. I have ready all your comments and will answer them shortly.

Microsoft recently decided to invite a select group of hackers to break into their systems. The amazing part is that they decided to invite the programmers who created these products to witness this. There is one section in the article that goes..."the developers faces started turning red. I am glad that they took it personally."

I think this is amazing, think about it this way. As an architect you build a house and someone demonstrates right in front of your eyes as to what is wrong and gives you a chance to correct it.

Thanks to Krishna for this article.

Who Will Google Buy Next ?

2005-06-15T11:13:00.000-04:00

This is a very intresting article via(http://slashdot.org).

It talks about the companies Google has acquired so far and what they have done with it and also about companies out there that might be under consideration.

It brings me to the point of innovation. Where is India on this, I have not heard of any IITans in the recent past that have done anything innovative. Come on guys wake up.

"What drives an individual to think of collecting money ?"

2005-06-13T13:47:00.001-04:00

This is a very touchy subject and I got flamed (email fights in layman terms) by many of my buddies coz they did not understand my point. I was not trying to say that they were cheaters, I just wanted to logically think.

After a big disaster like the Tsunami, there were loads of people who wanted to help. I did my part, went to a dinner organized by the Indian Student Association, spent a day working with the Sri Lankan Association in town and things like that.

But there were buddies of mine, who decided that they wanted to collect money from others and do the work themselves.

What struck me was the question "How does one think of collecting money ?" There are a million organizations the world, right from the Prime Ministers office in the affected countries right down to local organizations who already collect the money. Given that a percentage of this money is wasted or stolen, I still decide to contribute to these organizations.

But how one earth would an individual collect the money, even if he did, how does he know that the money is spent or given to the individuals who are acctually affected and not the by standers who are there just to loot people. Government organizations have a lot of red tape and yes it does take a while for the money to be distributed, but we can be assured that a huge percentage of the money will go to the needy.

In contrast, one of my uncles decided that he wanted to goto a resturant, buy food in packets and distribute it near the beach. In the end he was disgusted, because there were fights and he came to the conclusion that he spent more money on looters and opportunitists than on people who acctually deserved it. The problem was as an individual he had no way of identifying who was affected and who was not.

The second point is that it takes a lot of leg work to acctually distribute the money that one personally collects. Its a lot of responsibility, given that the money was given for the specific purpose of helping the affected, not just for the homeless or the needy. It takes a huge organization like the PMO (Prime Ministers Office) to acctually identify the affected and as an individual this is a daunting task.

So here goes my question again "What drives an individual to think of collecting money ?"

Do Car companies make flawed cars ?

2005-06-09T10:19:00.000-04:00

Update

GM to Cut 25,000 Jobs by 2008. http://www.themoscowtimes.com/stories/2005/06/09/254.html

A similar article was played on NPR on http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=4629995. On your top left you should have a link that says listen to listen to the segment of the radio program.

A few days ago me and my roomie saw a commercial for the new Hyundai Sonata. The car looked good, really good, it had shades of the current Accord and then started the discussion. Are all cars created equal ? If they are not .... Shouldn't they be ?

I just went to different websites and checked the figures. Honda has 9 vehicles, Nissan has 11 and Toyota has 16. (these are just the models, not the various variants)

Ford has 8 brands under its belt and GM has 12 brands. Assuming each brand has 5 cars, Ford makes 40 different vehicles and GM makes 60. That's atleast 150% more cars than their Japanese friends.

As everyone knows the Japanese cars are very reliable, efficient and have a good resale value as compared to their American counter parts. Given the fact that the American companies make more cars, should they not be better. I mean logically, they have more data, more money, more research facilities and more of everything. So why are American cars not as good (I am not talking power, actually, Europe can make the American cars feel like toys, that's a different post) and not as reliable.

My argument was two fold initially, now I have an additional point.

1) Culture. Japan is a country where efficiency and perfection is important. Hard working and dedicated, their products reflect the same thing. Americans on the other hand concentrate on being different, bold and powerful. This is evident from the life style of the public, their design and life in general.

2) Financial Status of the companies. It is a known fact that the American companies are much richer than the Japanese counterparts. Again American companies could be spending more in making each car as compared to the others. But if the Japs can make cheaper and more reliable cars, why are the American companies not learning form this ?

I mean if the American cars were as reliable, wouldn't more people buy it ? Wouldn't their value go up ?

Which precisely brings me to my third point. Do American companies want to make flawed cars ?

Recently someone told me that a famous toothpaste company wanted to make people buy more of its product. What did they do ? They increased the size of the hole at the end of the tube, making people use more paste and as a result buying more.

Are the American car companies doing the same ? Are they making flawed cars so that people will have to buy newer cars more quickly? I heard something supporting this claim recently. A co worker told me that the Car and oil companies shut down the tram system in LA at a time when the LA public transportation system was supposed to be one of the best in the country. This article http://www.pednet.org/artoilwars.html talks about this specific point among others.

Read the part about the public transportation system.

I do not have enough knowledge to make a conclusion, but the final point seems very interesting, it will make for an interestingly conversation. Let me know what y'all think.

Life Cycle of a Blogger

2005-06-08T10:46:00.000-04:00

Blogging is some kind of peer pressure. You start reading blogs and you watch seinfeld and come up with your own views and you want to have your own space.

http://www.minjungkim.com/?p=2675 has an intresting artice about this. Via (Kiruba)

Book Tagging

2005-06-07T19:46:00.000-04:00

I really do not read books any more. Given that I just finished grad school and the new job, I just cannot find time. But just like Kriba, in the spirit of things... here goes

Total books I own : Think about 120

Last book I bought : How to move Mount Fuji. Yeah Microsoft had something to do with it, but its an intresting book that makes you think. Thanks to Dushy, I acctually brought this book.

Last book I read : Inscrutable American- Anurag Mathur. This is about an Indian student here in the US. Its amazingly funny and touches on every aspect of a students life here, a must read for anyone planning on coming here or has been here.

Books that mean a lot to me: Not a penny More, Not a penny less - Jeffery Archer. One of the most amazing books I have ever read. I recommend this to every one who loves fiction and anyone who has anything to do with stocks or finances. I cannot remember any other book in the recent past that I wanted to finish.

Tag five people and have them do this on their blogs:
Barath Ramabadran (http://hawkeyeview.blogspot.com/)
Devika Menon (http://devikamenon.blogspot.com/)
Hemanth (http://Instantkaapi.com)
Sukanya (http://saintfaron.blogspot.com/)
Nanda (http://themottaiboss.blogspot.com/)

Yahoo Messenger India - Beta

2005-06-06T13:21:00.000-04:00

Recently a friend pointed out that I was running the US version of YIM (Yahoo Instant Messenger) Beta and not the Indian version.

The difference is subtle, but all my Indian friends would love it.
Download the messenger from http://in.beta.messenger.yahoo.com/ and after installing it goto the Audibles section.

In there you will find around 18 different desi audibles (all in hindi, one in bengali (I think)).

Its got a wide variety from Jhony Lever making comments to pretty Indian ladies (cartoon of course) with a bhindi saying stuff. Its a must try for anyone who uses Yahoo.

The beta also uses VOIP for voice chats and the quality is much better than before with almost no lag times.

So go on out and take a look.

Love Schumacher or F1 you should read this.

2005-06-06T11:12:00.000-04:00

For the longest while I have been visiting formula1.com (which this year became the official f1 site) and Planetf1.com an unofficial site, which gave me an indepth coverage on everything that could not be official.

There is this intresting section in planetf1 called Schumi's sekret diary (aka. Das SekretTagebuch Michael Schumachers). Its a fictional account of what Schumi writes in his diary and is very funny.

If you are a tifosi or just another formula1 fan make sure you check it out. http://www.planet-f1.com/features/off_on_f1/story_19529.shtml

Dude... Why are these men holding hands ? Ooh my god. Are we where I think we are ?

2005-06-03T18:26:00.000-04:00

It was a chilly Sunday night in December 2001, a few weeks after I had arrived in the US. I was staying temporarily with a few Indian kids (duh!). Me and one of my friends decided that it was time for us to go check out the clubs in town. We were out talking to one of our neighbours and he suggested this place called Brothers.

Given the fact that we had never been to a club here and that we acctually knew the directions to this place, we decided to hit it up. We got there around 11:30-12 (clubs here close at 2), there was a long line and we were waiting and chatting up with people. There were two cute girls behind us and they were talking about a gay club. My smart friend turned around and said ..."atleast I am not going to one".

The girls burst out laughing, when we asked them what was going on, they said this club was a gay club, but on Sunday nights, it was 80's night and there were more straight people, in the meanwhile, we had gotten to the door. A quick meeting and we decided that we would check the place out, we did not know any other club and it would be too late anyways and yeah we had gotten in for free.

After about 10 minutes, I needed to use the restroom, I walked in, ran out and paused. I had just seen two grown men kiss each other. Not that I have anything against gay people, but this was just not natural, atleast given my background, given my culture and given the fact that this was the first time I was acctually amidst a culture where it was ok. The more I looked around, the place seemed to get brighter, the more I was seeing. Men, women and everything that moved seem latched on to something or the other. Men holding hands with other men and women doing a little more than that.

As soon as I found my friend, I left the place.

In a few days, the incident became funny and it still it. It was an adventure, maybe I would have reacted better, had I, in advance known more specific details. But hey atleast I did not get hit on ;-)

Motorola V551 - Review

2005-06-02T16:08:00.000-04:00

V551

I was using a Sony Ericssion T610 till a few weeks ago. My charger failed and I had to bring out my emergency stash of phones and the only one in there was my new Motorola V 551. Please read my other blog for my review on the T610 http://clrkn.blogspot.com/2005/05/t610-review.html

The motorola V551 looks kinda cool. I like the blue outer cover and the metallic front, it kinda sets it apart from the rest of the flip phones that follow Henry fords policy ("you can have any color as long as its black, every flip phone is metallic) .

The layout of the buttons is like any other flip phone, except I do not understand the use of two buttons that acheive the same function. If I could lay my hands on the guy who designed the user interface for this phone, I would do the world a favor and dispose him.

Do this simple test and you will see what I mean: (this works on the V551, might work on other motorolas, never used one, so do not really know)

1) open the phone
2) press the button to the top left (the screen just above it should read recent)

So the way this is laid out, this button is a selection button... right ?

3) once the button is pressed you will see a list (received calls, dialed calls, notepad etc. etc.)

4) now check out what the button does...

It now automatically becomes an exit button

So if you click the select button, move to dialled called and (by habit and common sense) click the same button, you are back to where to started.

How fuc***g LAME. Given the fact that I am programmer with a little thing called usability stuck in my head, I think motorola should be banned from making anything with a menu from this point on.

The phone also has other issues, when you receive a missed call / message and you decide to ignore it, trouble starts. From that point on, anytime you close your phone, an alert pops up saying you have a missed call or a message. Until you check the received calls section or listen to the message the alert keeps coming back. To me this is crazy, I know who called, I decided to ignore, now why would the phone annoy me ?

Hiding your number is a pain, the menu is stoopid, everything in this phone is crazy.

Think about this, when you want to send a photo to your friend via bluetooth, you would logically select send and then select how you would want to send it ... right. WRONG. On a Motorola send is only for picture messages (the one to send via cingular's network), but hidden below there are two other options, copy and paste, once you select this, then you choose how to send the messages.

Think about this, you are on the phone with someone and they give you a number, normally you key the number in as you are talking and save it right. Not here, coz as soon as the other person hangs up, the screen clears and everything you were typing in, is now history. What is wrong with these people.

The battery life sucks, more so coz they did not manage the features right. On the T610, the bluetooth used to auto shut off, not here, here you do not know what the hell is going on. Well it would not matter, coz you first have to dig through the menu to figure out where blue tooth is.

Overall, I would not recommend this phone to anyone not even my enemy (there is the higher priced killer moto razr for that, that will blow a bigger hole in his pocket). So please stay away, this phone should not even be called a phone. This product has made me cringe so much that I do not think I will ever buy a motorola product EVER again.

Hate the penguin ? Here are some games you will love.

2005-06-01T13:03:00.000-04:00

Being a Sys. Admin., I have always had a liking for anything MS. Not that I hated the penguin, but here is a website (yeah you hafta register now) that has some really cool games that will get you hooked.

Take a look fellas http://www.yetisports.org/

The Lost TV Remote Controller

2005-05-31T17:24:00.000-04:00

Over the ages, men have become addicted to a zillion things. Cars, TV's and the biggest one of them all remote controls. We like being lazy, not getting out of our lazy boys (I know I spelt it wrong coz of legal reasons) and sitting on our ass and still getting things to magically work. I am an extreme case, I do not like to get up to even turn off my air conditioner, I got one with a remote, just coz it would make things easier.When I lived alone, I had 5 remotes, just coz it made life simpler for me. I hated and still hate cords, I went wireless with my desktop, with my roomies X box controller and everything that could go wireless. This way everything was spread around my couch and I had access to all the amenities without moving.

Personally, I think remote controllers should be the centuries best invention. Think about how many different applications it has and how life would suck if we did not have a remote.

Moving on, Being in college has its own privileges. Throwing parties and having fun is one of the perks. There have been lots of funny things that have happened (Click here for a previous party story.)

So if you have already read "The Hug", you will know that I lived with a bunch of guys who loved to throw parties.

Like every other party we threw, this was a big one. Food, Beer, Coke and Pizza for the folks. Being one of the "well to do" apartment among the Indian students, we were the first to have a 25" TV. Of course it was brought during the thanks giving, but to the others it did not really matter.

Like always all the Indian kids were there, drinking, dancing (ooh I forgot the story of the snake dance) and having a good time. As the evening turned into the wee hours of morning, the kids we wanted to sober up were sitting and watching TV. I sat down for a little while to check the weather or something.

Soon everyone was out and we all went to bed. Now the thing to remember is that the next day was Sunday. And one of my roomies who could not cook even for a million dollars always made breakfast. It was a thing to enjoy, coz finally you could set your ass down and have decent eggs without having to be in the kitchen. Well, he made good eggs... Anyways, so we wake up, take our glass of orange juice and turn on the TV. Within the next 5 minutes, we realize that the remote was missing.

It was ok, no big deal, since there were a bunch of people in the house, we always had someone near the TV to switch channels, it sucked during commercials, but it was ok. As the day progressed, we started getting more irate. It just was not working, we needed the remote. Given that our house was a mess, we decided to clean for a change and that way we would also find the remote. So finally out lazy asses decided to do something and we started cleaning.

I do not exactly remember, but I think we would have spent about 3 hours cleaning and searching for the remote, no luck. We did everything we could in our power, flipped the cushions, moved the couch, searched all the rooms (just in case we were drunk and had taken the remote in), but we just could not find it. We even searched the bathroom (maybe someone had taken it in there), LOL, we still turned up with nothing.

After a little cursing everyone out and cursing the suspect we had no clue about, we settled down. We decided to go with plan B, goto radio shack and get a remote. After walking for 15 minutes, we figured that radio shack was closed on Sundays. We could not take it anymore. We racked out brains to figure out where the remote had gone and the only logical conclusion was that someone with the same TV as ours had to have taken it. There was only one guy with the exact same TV and he hated us. So the conclusion we come to was that he had taken it, just to piss us off and that we would not invite him for our parties from this point on (yeah like that worked).

Everytime we bumped into him, we all had this look on our faces, we for the longest time thought he had done it.

It should have been two years later, we had to move to a new apartment. And as usual the first thing to switch apartments was our couch. Given the fact that it was too heavy, I dropped it and vola .... The elusive remote popped out. We laughed our asses off and cursed each other out for the premature conclusion.

Although we had come to a bad conclusion, it just showed how desperate we got when we lost the remote for a day ( we got one from radioshack the next day), looking back at it, it was weird to see the effect of something as simple as a remote having such a drastic effect on us, who otherwise were normal people.

2005-05-27T09:41:00.000-04:00

The Tsunami hit the nilgiris... hmmmm

Coonoor is here... How did the Tsunami hit this region ? (Click to open a bigger picture)

This is in addition to what's on http://instantkaapi.com
and http://graynews.maine.com/2005-05-27/jennifer_white.html . In case you guys did not know, conoor is on the way to ooty and yeah its a hill station.

When Google does not reach Googol

http://photos1.blogger.com/img/211/2890/640/GmailGiveUp.jpg

Do you know what happens when the number of mails in your google account become a lil too much... ? Check out the pic.

Source : http://inagardencalledlife.blogspot.com/

Time Magazine Covers on India

For some reason, I went to the Time Magazine webiste. I looked up their covers and decided to search for India. There were lots of covers, but it is intresting to note that India had loads of covers from the 1930's all the way upto the 1980's, the last one about the Bhopal tragedy in 1984. After that we have come back on the cover for the Tsunami in 2005. Hmmm....
Click here to see the covers yourself

Toyota dogged by software

And all you idiots thought Microsoft was the only company that had bad software. http://money.cnn.com/2005/05/16/Autos/prius_computer/index.htm?cnn=yes

"No He does not drink... absoultely not" - How to cheat in an arranged marriage

2005-05-25T11:14:00.000-04:00

Arranged Marriage, still an everyday occurance in India. In most sane cases it is not as bad as you think it is. The couple gets to meet, talk and if things go well they decide to get engaged. The not so good part is that the whole family gets involved in making decisions, so if your mom does not like red and the girl's favourite color happens to be red... we could be in a bit of a soup.

So there is this girl, really close to my heart. No you idiots, she is a good friend. She got married a couple of years ago and now has a kid. When I was back in India, last summer, a few friends got to discussing her and I found a few intresting things.

So my friend's family decides to meet up with this guys family to talk things thro. All is well, the minor wrinkles are ironed out. The girls mom has one last issue. She does not like men who drink or smoke. Given that a relative works in the same office as the groom, she decides to call him to check on this.

So this is how the call goes....

Girls mom (GM) : "Hello, how are you ?"

Relative (R) : "Doing good. How are you ? Howz your family ?"

GM:" good good, I wanted to talk to you about YYYY, does he drink, does he smoke ?"

R: "No way, he is a very nice guy, he does not drink , he does not smoke. I am having dinner, can I call you later ?"

GM: "Sure, and thanks for the information"

R: "no problem. Bye", hangs up and to the waiter "Can we get another pitcher of beer please ?"

R: talking to someone sitting next to him "Guess who called ? It was the girls mom and they were asking about you ..."

YYYY: "Ha ha ha, I do not drink... and do not smoke...."

R: "Let's drink to that.... ha ha ha"

And if you still dont get it, read the converstaion, make sure you follow the names.

The Crimson Room

2005-05-24T13:16:00.000-04:00

As usual I was checking my stats and looked at http://instantkappi.com for updates.

I found this intresting link to a game and damn I took about half an hour until I decided to get the solution from google. Yeah and I collected 9 items before I looked up the cheat code.

Check it out and see how many items you can collect....

http://www.instantkaapi.com/archives/000959.html

I cheated and solved
the Crimson Room
and I don't care.
Want to solve it too?
brought to you by b-sting.nl

The 911 operator said "Sir, hangup and never call us back."

2005-05-23T23:17:00.000-04:00

For Indian Readers: Just like you call 100 for Fire, 101 for Ambulance etc. the number here in the US is 911

For American readers: It takes upto a year to get a phone in India, things could have changed in the recent past. You could also officially pay a little extra and get a new phone connection in 3 months.

About a year ago one of my cousins came to the US. He went to this university where I had a friend and as it would happen, I got to know a lot about his activities thro my people.

This is a true life story and I know I am going to get blasted for this... but this acctually happened.

Fall of 2004 this cousin of mine enters the US, goes to his little town and in a couple of weeks finds himself an apartment. Like most Indian grad students, he gets an apartment in a complex with a lot of Indians. He gets his utilities, cable and all that jazz. Now all he needs is a home phone.

Using his neighbours phone, he calls his local phone company and is waiting for someone to answer the call. In the meanwhile he is also flipping thro the phone book and vola he sees a number for emargency... 911. Now you have to understand that he has not lived in the country for more than a couple of weeks and does not know what the number means. Thinking that it is the number to get a phone line ASAP (just like in India), he calls the number. The operator picks up and asks him as to what went wrong... He says "Well I need a phone like immediately and the other number I called is just taking too much time.". The operator is shocked and then pissed and says "Please hangup and NEVER call us back."

The funnier part of this whole episode is that my cousin explained the call to his neighbour who sorted things out for him. My cousin also asked the neighbour to keep this between themselves. But within 24 hours I got a call from my sources about this and when I called my cousin he could not beleive that every Indian in his university had come to know about this, he then figured the laughs he got when he got introduced earlier that day to loads of new people.

Moral of the story..... aint got one, its just funny.

The Cop Says "get out of the car, put your hands on the hood and spread your legs"

2005-05-21T18:23:00.000-04:00

Sometime December 2003. I am living with two other fellow south Indians. Along comes a long weekend. We decide to take a road trip. After a little pondering, we decided to goto Arkansas. It would be a 17 hour drive and among the three of us, we thought we would not have any trouble.

We started driving from Tallahassee, Fl friday evening. The drive was amazing, we decided to stick to state roads and my roomie was driving pretty fast. Once inside Arkansas, we decided to fill some gas. We switched drivers and kinda got lost. Deciding that the best thing was to goto sleep and track our way back in the morning, we pulled into a rest area and went to sleep.

A beautiful Saturday morning it was. I woke up, walked outside and for the first time I was seeing the colors, the shades of yellow and orange and red. It was amazing. We started driving and took the first exit to turn around, just before the exit, we spotted a cop car in the opposite direction, so we decided to drive slowly and we did stick to the plan when we took out U turn.

We passed the cop and about 5 minutes later my roomie goes... "oh shit, the cop is tailing me..". This is normally not a good sign, also given the fact that we were a bunch of Indian kids, in the middle of nowhere kinda got to us. After following us for a mile he turned on the lights, we pulled over and he walked up and said " I pulled you over coz your gas tank is open". My dumb roomies had forgotten to shut the gas tank. I was cursing them out, little did I know that this would be the least of my worries.

Since the cop was a state trooper, he asked the driver to walk with him to the patrol car. So my roomie went. Meanwhile me and the other guy were sitting in there thinking what the hell is going on. We were not speeding, so why is he holding us up ? The thought that crossed our minds was that We were brown. It was understandable, cops were trained to look for weird people in weird places, a bunch of college kids from florida in arkansas rang a bell... maybe.

A couple of minutes later, the cop comes back and started girlling us. "Where are y'all from ? , What are you doing here ?, how do you know each other? How long are you gonna stay here ? Where is your student ID ?". It was all cool, we were not lying, so we were confident. We were doing good and would be outta there in a minute. But then the cop asked..."What are you guys planning on doing when you are here.. ?".

I said "Well we are probably gonna go trekking, look at some caves and enjoy the views.", given the fact that I was the only one who did any kinda reserch on this place, It was a good answer. We were seconds away from freedom, when my roomie goes.."We also are gonna go hunting.."

HUNTING ??? Are you fu**ing kidding me ? I dont eat meat, I have never held a gun in my hand, ever, neither have the other two, we dont have hunting licenses, all this aside, we were pulled over in the middle of nowhere and the cop accutallly thought we were working for the other side and now you say "hunting?". I was kicking myself, I was gonna kill my roomie if I got a chance.

There was a smirk on the cops face, all I could think of was what the cop was gonna say. I knew how this worked. I had seen enough episodes of Cops and a million movies... the dialogue was gonna be, can you gentleman please step outside the vehicle, out your hands on the hood and spread you legs. I dreaded this... This was it..

Those were the most agonising 10 seconds of my life. It looked like it was 10 minutes, I remember the cop, his bald head partly visible between his forehead and this hat. I was freaking out. I had a great weekend planned and one word was gonna screw it all up. Sir "do you have hunting licenses ?", we sid no, he asked us if we had guns, we said no. He asked us if he could search the car, we said sure.... By this time, he knew that my friend had just blurted out something he should not have.

10 Minutes later, we were on our way. But till day, we smack our friend on the back of his head and go..."yes officer, we are going hunting.." So as a tip to all my Indian friends here, if you are ever pulled over, talk as little as you can and ask the others to shut the hell up.

Behind The Blouse Pieces - The Indian Variation of the Fruit Cake

2005-05-21T02:12:00.000-04:00

Just like americans talk about that one fruit cake that gets wrapped and passed around, this is the Indian version. Make sure you check it out. http://hawkeyeview.blogspot.com/2005/02/blouse-piece-transactions.html

Thanks Y'all

2005-05-21T01:46:00.000-04:00

My Stats for the first week

Wanna thank all of you out there for reading all that I had to write. I am still waiting for your comments. I will be adding my blogroll over the weekend. But if you get a chance visit http://instantkaapi.com. It aint just the blogs there, its also his blogroll that makes me want to get a masal dosa right now (reminds me of south india).

Thanks once again, now I have someone to write for.

The List of Authors- Explained

2005-05-20T22:23:00.000-04:00

The Author List

http://www.phdcomics.com/comics/archive.php?comicid=562

I was reading thro some blog and saw a funny catroon. It was from http://www.phdcomics.com. The one on here explains who the 5-6 people on a paper are and how they get their positions in there. Any grad student who has written a paper would agree with this...

Damn this pissed people off

2005-05-20T15:40:00.000-04:00

Below is the label from an American Beer. It was all cool, until an Indian found a beer mug in the hands of Ganesha. Now he is suing the beer company.

Someone was drunk....

I am pretty sure that like yoga, they thought this was something cool. Little did they know that now they will be run out of business.

Aishwarya Rai Vs Mallika Sherawat

2005-05-20T14:58:00.001-04:00

Photographs: Getty Images (from rediff.com)

'Mallika won't repeat Aishwarya's error'
http://specials.rediff.com/movies/2005/may/13mallika.htm

WTF ???

Mallika's designer made this comment. I am not sure if Mallika would agree with the fact that Aishwarya made a mistake. Look at the photos above, Mallika looks like an "exotic Indian hooker". I am not saying that the clothes looks bad, but the occasion to wear something like this is bad. If this is representing India, I am happy that aishwarya decided to go with a dress. Atleast she looks more dignified.

She goes on to say

"I won't make a blunder by making her wear a gown. You cannot put a kimono on a Western girl and ask her to walk like a Chinese girl. If you tell a western girl to wear a sari, obviously she will not be able to carry herself the way an Indian woman does. We make the same mistakes with gowns. We don't have the figure to wear a gown. That was an error made by Aishwarya and we don't want to repeat it."

Are you kidding me ? Sweety wake up and smell the sun. Aishwarya looks as pretty as any other Hollywood girl.

Go to the pics, take a look and decide for yourself.

Images from India

2005-05-20T11:35:00.000-04:00

A very instresting blog by a fellow south Indian. There is an article about photos from India in this blog, called RK's images.

Like the author points out, these images are nostalgic and amazing. Take a look if you get a chance.

Many blogs become one

2005-05-19T22:59:00.000-04:00

Under some professional advice, I have decided to combine all my blogs into one. I hope this attracts more traffic.

And yes, I have decided to go with the gargantuan monkey fist as the title, it makes more sense to me ;-)

The Hug

2005-05-19T22:49:00.000-04:00

"Drinking is very bad...." Say a lot of people. In my humble opinion I beg to differ. Drinking is a lot of fun (as long as you know what your limit is and do not drive) for everyone who drinks and those sober idiots, who are pissed when you are laughing your arse off.

Drinking with friends is healthy for the friendship. You curse each other out, discuss that one girl both of you were hitting on and of course tell the other person what he did wrong. Its one situation where you can get away with almost anything. The sober people always give you the reason of doubt, its like walking away from a murder, all your attorney had to do was to say ..."Your honor, my client, who is an outstanding example of good conduct committed the serious act of murder, because he was DRUNK".

The number of drinking stories in my book are many, anyone who has been around me knows about the "snake dancer", "the hug", "the stolen remote", "The difference between a player and a true player", "the concentric circles of life" and more recently " I don't know you like that".

I start this section of my blog with "the hug".

Its Spring 2002, my first semester at FSU and a happening one at that. Me and my roomies were known to throw "The Best Indian Parties" in town, hands down. It took us a few more parties to realize that we were wasting money, but that's another story by itself.

That semester I lived with three other people. Three guys and one girl. It was a chilly evening and it was my roomie's birthday. Every Indian student we knew, not just the one's we hung out with, but every single one of them we knew was there. There was loads of food for the meat eaters and veggies, there was pizza for the Indian's who didn't like Indian food, there was beer for the men, alcohol for the men who didn't like beer, there were wine coolers for the women.

One of my roomies in this real life story is the hero of this blog. The dude's room was turned into the dance floor for obvious reasons. He did not have furniture, except that table his computer and music system stood on, his room had a door to the lawn, so the drunk and the smokers could spill out of the house. Every arrangement had been made, the play list on the dude's computer had been checked and cleared by all of us for the best selection of party and dance music. It was on.

The party started early around 9ish. People started spilling in and yeah no one brought a thing, coz they all knew we would be loaded. But that did not matter. In a couple of hours the alcohol was getting emptied, new trash bags were being put in, pizza was almost over and every one was dancing and the ones who couldn't were watching.

Our dude was getting his game on. Chatting up with the women, drinking his alcohol, nothing added to it (no I don't know why) and having a great time. We had a little roomies meeting in my bedroom and concluded that we had once again thrown the best party and everyone had been taken care of. We always had good neighbor's, the ones who were high all the freaking time and did not mind our crazy parties, so there was no problem on that front. All we had to do was to make sure that our guests did not puke and that they did not drive drunk.

To understand more of this story, we have to go back 4 months, it was a time when I was still back home. But our dude had a party for his birthday, one of the similar ones we were throwing, but not on such a grand scale. His biggest birthday gift was a margarita glass, a big margarita glass, a really big one. If his head was a size smaller than normal, he could have drowned in that glass it was that big.

Back to the present, it was getting late, not coz it was late, but coz everyone was a lil tipsy, people had been drinking free liquor since 10 and you know how that goes... "Finders drinkers, losers sobers". The music was still on and there were a few tipsy guys watching the news, yeah at 1 in the morning, told ya drunk people do crazy shit. I made my rounds to make sure everyone was ok and returned to the dance floor to get a lil sober, so I could hit my secret stash of beer in the fridge.

I am stopped on the way, by our dude of course and his "little" glass with some old monk (yeah its Indian alcohol, try it if you get a chance). He goes..."Dude... I think I am a little drunk... ha ha ha... You mind if I sleep in your bed today ?... Alone... ha ha ha". I thought for a second and said "sure man, not a problem... Go right ahead" and I returned to getting sober.

An hour later the music was dying down, I was tired and pissed (the pizza was gone and so was all the food). I decided that I was gonna grab a glass of water (to avoid dehydration) and get to bed. I walked into my room and the dude was not on my bed. For a second there, I felt happy, maybe he left with someone, maybe he didn't sleep on my bed.... and then I looked at the bathroom door that was closed. Through the cracks I could still see light from inside. My hopes were destroyed, my bed was violated and of course I grabbed a sheet and a pillow and decided to lie down on the carpet.

It should have been about 10 minutes, I felt weird sleeping on the carpet, I turned over and for some reason I looked at the bathroom door, probably to check if my roomie was out. The light was still on. I checked the bed to see if his drunk ass had forgotten to turn off the light, but he was still not in the bed. Now I got a little worried, this guy had always been a little strange, a little drunk, a little excited, a little crazy and the kinds who laughs at a joke when everyone else had finished laughing. I was worried that he was in there, taking his extra time in my restroom to the next level. I jumped up, knocked on the door and called out "Dude you in there ? ". As you would expect no answer. My world was coming to an end. He had slept in my bed, used my restroom and now what ?

Ask any man, he has one big fear, something he would never ever ever want to do, even by accident.... to bump into a man who is not clothed. I was here in at 2 something in the night, going to experience the thing that every man dreaded or so I thought. I knocked once more, no response, I slowly twisted the handel, the door was open. I pushed the door open and there was the most "amazing" site I had ever seen in my life. No stoopid, he was not naked.

Our dude had passed out HUGGING the potty. It was funny, it was crazy, it was weird and it was so confusing that I forgot to take a photo. But there he was, the 25 year old, drunk roomie of mine, hugging the potty like it were his girl friend and he had passed out. I stood there with a smirk on my face, I knew I had to get him out of there, so I tried waking him up. No response.

I tried lifting him and he was too heavy, or maybe the alcohol had made him heavy, It was too confusing at that point. I ran out and brought my other roomies in, they looked at the dude and started cracking up. Finally with someone's help, we moved the dude back to my bed and we all went to sleep.

I have had loads of other things happening, but THE HUG will forever remain the funniest thing that ever happened ...Drinking.

The second quarter

2005-05-19T11:55:00.000-04:00

If this is the first time you are reading this blog, please go down and start from the first quarter, you never want to read the final score before knowing what happened in the other quarters... do you ?

So once the players have been scoped out and things settle into a rythm, the second quarter begins. This is one of the very important stages of the game. You can walk away with a lead, be tied or loose the game right here and its no different in a relationship. This is the "I think I know you, unless you have tricks up your sleeve" period.

This is also called the period of "the hand". Here is where the both of you establish the hand, needless to say, if you are lazy here, consider yourself ass whooped. In certain relationships, its close. One day you have the hand, the other day she does. Its a real close game and both of you know the importance of the hand. The first person to relax or screw up looses the hand and gives away more points than he can recover in the next few plays. So in a close relationship, you need to stay up, stay focussed and use every single opportunity.

Trust me when I say women love to control you and being our lazy selves we let them have it, until one day you wake up to find your bedroom smelling good and having clean undies for a change. Its amazing my friends, things that you never did in the past year, she did over the weekend. But beware, this is no indication of the future. This is just a trick play, that all women have. She if just setting the environment and she likes it to stay that way. What she just did is legal, but something you were not expecting, so now you cave in for a second and before you know it, she shot that three pointer and also dunked over you.

There are two ways to counter this trick play.

1) Never give her the chance to pull one on you.

This, though sounds simple is real hard. Its impossible to improve on perfection. So all aspects of your life that she knows about, should be perfect or should look like its perfect. No bitching about people, no waiting for your clean clothes to run out, no complaining about the color of your bedroom, nothing. Act like everything is perfect, else you have opened up one of your weaknesses, something that she can act on to fix. Even if you feel like openening up, open up to something that is impossible for her to fix, your car, your hair, things that she cannot mess around with, without your knowlege.

2)Pull a trick play of your own.

In the course of getting to know her, you would have noticed something wrong, something that she is not satisfied with. Now, if you want the hand, you have to swoop in, clean up and get the hand.

The second technique can be used as a pre-emptive strategy and if used correctly can also work after she has just pulled one of her own. If you are using this after her play to get the hand, timing is important. If you wait for too long, you have lost it. You move in as soon as she pulled the play and counter her move with something big of your own. Once you do this, never tell her that this was a counter move. Tell her that you have always wanted to do it, but you were just waiting for the right time. Never ever ever tell her that you did this to thank her or anything even remotely close to that.

So after a few flip flops, someone ultimately gains the hand, someone controls the relationship, someone drives the car and then time runs out and you go back to your locker room. While you are there rethinking your strategy, she is too. While she is planning her second half, you should be doing the same. Listen to your coach, its never easy to have the hand and maintain in without being fouled out. If you are the better scorer, she is going to do all that she can to foul you out of the game. The trick is to understand that she is trying to foul you out and still be in the game.

The third quarter is important, so relax, think about your strenghts and more importantly about her strengths and we will meet back here in a few....

The first quarter

2005-05-19T03:06:00.000-04:00

I, like most men drive, rather than be driven. It is not about being in complete control, but given a choice, I like to be in a position to change course if deemed necessary.

Men in general are lazier than women. This is a fact that has been proved for generations. In any relationship, things start out the same way, being fake. Fake could be a strong word, but you try to be something that you usually are not, even if its subtle it counts.

Along the same lines, Men ask for opinions, suggestions and input from the lady. "Where would you like to go for dinner ?", "What movie would you like to go to ?", "Popcorn or Nachos ?". At this point, the women are also playing the game. They answer the question with "Anything is fine with me", "I don't eat out much" and yada yada yada.

Welcome to the first quarter of your relationship, this is as simple a basketball game. New teams facing each other, the opponents have not met before, have no clue about strengths and weaknesses on the other side and are just observing the other person. This is the exploration phase, you ask questions, see what the other person likes, hustle and make mental notes about the opponent. Just like the offensive coach always told you, scope for the weakest person in the defense and match him against the best or at least a good player from your side. That's how every point is earned both in the game and in life. You match your strengths against her weaknesses and you always always hide your weaknesses. If you have not noticed, ever so often you see yourself face to face with someone, the quicker and smarter person walks off with a point or two.

Trying to establish the upper hand in this quarter is not just bad etiquette, its also close to impossible. You don't want to come on as too strong, that never helps. If the refrees get a whiff of that, they are going to be watching you in the paint and every little thing you do will be counted against you and chances are that you wont be in the game till the final whistle.

So give yourself some room, relax and just try to observe your opponent in this quarter.

Narain Karthikeyan - Star of the future

2005-05-18T22:54:00.001-04:00

http://formula1.com/news/2996.html

Being an Indian I follow on Narain's career and what people say about him. I am a staunch Ferrari / Schumacher fan. But it kinda becomes my duty to back homeboy.

With the car he has Narain has done good. Being the back runners, we dont really get to see much of them on TV, but you never know how well he could have been had he been in a better car and with a stronger team. Maybe time will answer the question.

Narain's Helmet with the Indian Flag

2005-05-18T22:54:00.000-04:00

Narain's Conterversial Helmet

This is the helmet that the Indian government is out to get.

Firstly, that aint even Indian colors. It looks kinda sorta like the Indian flag, but it aint. The chakra (the wheel on the top) is a dead give away though.

India is one of the very few developing countries that has a chance of representing itself in a global sport. I think it is the personal opinion of the preson to represent himself as an Indian or an individual. I understand that the Indian goverment has strict rules about where and when a flag can be displayed and how.. for all the right reasons. But this is a case where the person has decided to represent himself as an Indian and is showing the world that we are there making a mark.

I really think this is not a big deal, as long as Narain does not have the flag on his shoes or something.

2005-05-18T22:53:00.000-04:00

Narain in the EJ-15

What has the world come to ?

2005-05-18T22:52:00.000-04:00

Growing up, when your best friend had a moustache, you wanted one. You liked seeing your father shave and you wanted to do it. As a kid we have craved everything that adults do, wear pants, drive cars, have your own money to spend, your own TV, your own everything.

And then there comes a time when you would rather relax and let life take its own course. You would like to spend one more day in school before you graduate, smoke one more cigratte before you quit, drink one more beer before you leave.

Of late, I have found myself in the company of people who are busy preparing to get married. Given that I am 25 and all my friends are in the same age group, its understandable. I have nothing against them, I wish them all the luck. The part that sucks is that I am right there, single, not trying to hookup and yet I am in the middle of so many relationships getting into the next stage.

When I carefully span the spectrum, every single one of my friends, who is as old as me has been in a relationship for the past few years. The only ones I know who were not in one, were either the "mom will find me a girl" or "Dude how do you get laid so often?" kinda guys. Every single one of my good friends from undergrad is hooked up and they are planning their weddings now.

As the story goes, no more drinking buddies "I went out last week dude, I can't" and this was the "no man the party ain't over its only 4 AM" guy. No more dinner buddies "Dude I need to call India to talk to this girl, maybe after 11 ". Are all these guys are either growing up ?

If this is happening to me, it should and would be happening to every other person I know. It should have happened to my dad, his friends, my uncles, my sister who is a few years older than I am. I never heard anyone talk about this, I never saw a book at Barnes and Noble about this. Or.... is this happening to just me ?

Whatever the answer may be, I know that at this stage, I just want time to stand still, I do not want things to change, I do not want to grow up, if it is growing up.

Dont get me wrong, I dont have a problem with commitment, its just the kind of commitment and the time at which it happens. I know this aint the time for me, I am not sure when the time will be, but for now let time stay still.

T610 - Review

2005-05-18T22:51:00.000-04:00

Sony Ericssion T 610

I have been a cellphone user for a long time now. Around 5 years. My first cellphone was a ericsson flip phone with a two line grey scale display. My latest is a Motorola V551.

Along the years I have seen cellphones take various shapes and forms and sizes. They packed way too many features loosing site of the basic fact that no matter what it could do, it still should be a good phone.

About a year ago I got my T 610. I had no idea about how the phone was, but I was getting it for free, so I decided to take it. The bluetooth headset was a bonus.

Having had the phone for such a long time, I think the phone looks ok. Atleast when you compare it with the newer phones, the T 610 is just plain blah. My battery cover has a small dent and is scratched pretty hard. Another irritating feature, though I got used to it was that the button on the right hand side had direct access to the internet and you could not change its functionality.

The navigation is very intutive. After a few weeks of using the phone, you get used to the joy stick. The backspace and clear buttons are things I miss on my motorola. Every single option that you would use was made available within a couple of key presses. Things like put the phone on silent, turn on bluetooth, lock the phone's keypad were made available in a very easy fashion.

Bluetooth on the phone was ok. The reception was not always static free, but it worked. The T9 predictable text completion software was amazing, sending and receiving messages was also pain free. You could disable your phone number from being displayed in the receivers caller id and this is a feature that helped pull a couple of pranks on people.

The battery life on this phone is the best part. My phone lasts for a week without recharging, again I am not on the phone a lot. But even if I am, it lasts for a couple of days or even more. I have never had this with any other phone and am pretty sure that this will be a dream for other phone makers in the near future.

Overall, the T 610 is an amazing phone, so amazing that when I switched from T-Mobile to Cingular, I unlocked my phone so I could use it in the Cingular network. I have a strong feeling that I am going to sell my V551, so if there are any takers out there, gimme a call.

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